What a Pilates Class Taught Me About Leadership
I was mid-workout, in one of those intense Pilates flows that demand focus, breath, presence—and yet, there I was, fully in it physically when my brain did that thing again. You know, that thing. Where instead of focusing, it sprints straight into a monologue about something else entirely. It’s giving: “body in the studio, mind in a group chat with 37 unread messages.”
I really should get back into meditation.
But that’s not the point.
The point is— somewhere between planks and controlled breathing, I had a total epiphany about leadership. (Because apparently that’s how we do self-discovery now. On a reformer. Mid-leg raise.)
I looked around and noticed something: several people were doing the movements completely wrong. Not just slightly off—like, upside-down flamingo wrong.
And here’s what stuck out to me: they’d paid to be there. They were showing up. They were investing time, energy, and money. But they weren’t really listening to the instructor. Some were watching other students—who were also getting it wrong. Learning from the wrong source, unintentionally reinforcing the wrong habits.
That’s when I noticed the instructor walking around, quietly correcting people. Guiding them. Not calling anyone out — just noticing, adjusting, offering better direction.
Technically, in a class, it’s not the instructor’s job to walk around and adjust everyone individually. And yet—that’s what great teachers do. They notice. They guide. They care enough to correct. They’re not just there to give instructions—they’re there to develop people.
And that’s what leadership actually is.
I used to think leadership was about authority. Not in an ego way—but in that early-career belief that leaders were the ones with the answers. The ones in charge. The ones with the title. But over the past few years—and especially since leading a team—I’ve realized leadership isn’t about power. It’s about responsibility. It’s about teaching people how to solve problems, and eventually, how to solve their own.
It’s easy to assume that once someone has invested—signed up, bought in, joined the team, started working for your company—they should just “get it.” But learning isn’t passive. People don’t absorb information the same way. Especially when they’re unknowingly mirroring someone else who’s still figuring it out, too.
Real leadership is about attention. It’s in the one-on-one moments. One correction. One adjustment. That’s how growth actually happens — not through mass direction, but through focused attention. The belief that if someone is willing to show up, we should be willing to show up for them.
This Saturday, I’ll be speaking at a leadership event in London, and I already know I’m going to share this. Because leadership isn’t just for CEOs or sales managers or startup founders. It shows up in parenting. In mentoring. In friendship. In community work. It's not a title—it's a skill. One that anyone can build.
So if you're leading anything—your team, your household, your Sunday group chat—just remember: people aren't looking for someone with all the answers.They're looking for presence.
Leadership isn’t always loud. It’s not always in the spotlight.
Sometimes, it’s a quiet adjustment. A moment of attention. A choice to show up, even when no one asked you to.
That’s what great leaders do.
They don’t just direct.
They notice.
They develop.
Even in Pilates.
P.S. A few leadership books I’ve loved and actually recommend:
📚 Great Leaders Ask Great Questions – John Maxwell
📚 The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever – Michael Bungay Stanier
📚 Leaders Eat Last – Simon Sinek
📚 Trillion Dollar Coach: The Leadership Playbook of Silicon Valley's Bill Campbell – Eric Schmidt, Jonathan Rosenberg & Alan Eagle
📚 Start With Why – Simon Sinek